• Conscious Relationships

    We have been going through a period of great change, as we move from a patriarchal society to that of a balance of the masculine and feminine energies. Relationships need to go through a major redesign. The current paradigm isn’t working. People are unsatisfied in love; people don’t know how to make relationships work.

    This is not a bad thing. When systems break-down, that is when they change.Like the phoenix arising from the ashes. The break-down is forcing us to move towards conscious love. But how many people will sufer in the meantime, as the try to cling to what they thought they knew.

    So what exactly is a conscious relationship?

    It is a romantic relationship in which both partners feel committed to a sense of purpose, and that purpose is growth. Individual growth. Collective growth as a couple. Growth that makes the world a better place.

    As of now, most people get into relationships to satisfy their own personal needs. This might work for a few years, but eventually the relationship fails us, and we end up unsatisfied as a result.

    But when two people come together with the intention of growth, the relationship strives towards something much greater than gratification. The partnership becomes a journey of evolution, and the two individuals have an opportunity to expand more than they could alone. Deep satisfaction and long-term fulfillment arise as a result.

    So if you are someone who feels called to take your experience of romantic love to the next level, below are four qualities that characterize what being a conscious couple is all about. Welcome to the path of the conscious relationship. This is next-level love ...

    1. The conscious couple is not attached to the outcome of the relationship - growth comes first.

    Not being attached to the outcome of the relationship does not mean you do not care what happens! It also does not mean that you do not think about the future and how the relationship will turn out.

    What it means is that you are more committed to the experience of growth than you are to making the relationship “work.”

    The reality is, we are here to grow. Physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually. When growth stops, we automatically feel like something has gone wrong. Because it has. Without growth, we are not fulfilling our soul’s purpose.

    Unfortunately, relationships today tend to stifle growth more than enhance it, which is one of the main reasons that relationships are failing.

    We are brought up with fairy stories and books and films that give us an ideal that is far from the truth.

    We want our partners to act in a certain way, we repress ourselves to please others, and soon enough, we feel small, oppressed and puzzled about who we have become. This, inevitably, makes the relationship feel like a cage that we want to break out of. But the unfortunate truth is: we have caged ourselves.

    The conscious couple values growth more than anything else because they know this is the secret to keeping the relationship alive. Even though growth is scary (because it takes us into the unknown), the couple is willing to strive towards expansion, even at the risk of out-growing the relationship. Because of this, the relationship maintains a natural feeling of aliveness, and love between the couple does, too.

    2. Each person in the relationship is committed to owning their s#*t.

    Conscious couples know that we all have wounds from the past, and they understand that these wounds will inevitably be triggered, especially in a relationship. In other words, they expect to feel abandoned, trapped, rejected, overlooked and any other shitty feeling that arises when we bond closely with another person.

    Most of us still believe that relationships should only feel good, and when bad feelings surface, something has gone terribly wrong. What we fail to see in this situation is that these shitty feelings stem from our own faulty patterning! These issues are not caused by our partners; they are caused by our beliefs.

    The conscious couple is willing to look at their past and current issues in relationships because they know that by facing these beliefs systems, they can evolve into a new relationship-reality. Dysfunctional patterns will dissolve, but only when we take responsibility for them, first.

    3. All feelings are welcome and no internal process is condemned.

    In a conscious relationship, there is room to feel anything. Not only that, there is room to express those feelings and thoughts to your partner. This is edgy territory… it is not easy to do. So, many of us keep parts of ourselves hidden, even from our partners and it can be frightening to allow ourselves to be fully seen, But it is also one of the most healing things we can experience in a partnership.

    It is rare to be completely honest about who you are, and to stretch yourself to let your partner do the same. You may not like what you hear; in fact, it may trigger the hell out of you. But you are willing to be triggered if it means your partner can be authentic.

    We are used to molding and changing ourselves to please people we love because we do not want them to stop loving us! This stifles the love out of our connections.

    The only option is radical honesty: revealing parts of ourselves that are hard to share, and letting our partners do the same. This leads to feeling known, seen and truly understood — a combination that will automatically enhance your love.

    4. The relationship is a place to practice love.

    Love is a state of being. Love, ultimately, is a practice. A practice of acceptance, being present, forgiveness, and stretching your heart into vulnerable territories.

    Sometimes we treat love like it’s a destination. We want that peak feeling all the time, and when it is not there, we are not satisfied and think the relationship has failed,but this is missing the whole point of love.

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    Love is a journey and an exploration. It is showing up for all varied nuances of your relationship and asking yourself, What would love do here?” The answer will be different every time, and because of this, you will get to grow in ways you never have before!

    The conscious couple is fiercely committed to being the embodiment of love. And through their devotion and practice, love shows up in their lives and relationship in ways they would have never imagined before.

    In every moment we can make the choice whether to move towards love and commitment in the relationship or whether we turn our back and move away from it.

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